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golgotha,  place of the skulls, bit of a party in more ways than one… the central telepgraph pole on the hill connected in and sending out the best kind of juice to the dead, disinherited and disposessed…

this one is definately some kind of backlash against the ‘3 days’ that is refusing to cooperate!

I hope I haven’t scared anyone…

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Rock Solid

Three Days v3

Recovering from ruining a painting…taking each day as it comes…denial kicks in BIG TIME and I am ruining it a bit more each day as I try to fix up something that has already been lost. Just stop painting already!!!!! Can’t you see the damage you are doing!!!??? Step AWAY!!!

It’s a bit like living through a three day hangover, I guess. (having never actually had one I can only guess).

Day One is SUPER BAD. (So, not a good time to try and re-paint things!)

Day Two is groggy and bleary-eyed. (Again , Not a great time to re-paint, you can’t see properly!)

Day Three is cold and shivery. However, the light is pretty sharp through those pin-slit eyeballs. It’s a sombre day to appraise the damage while you are still feeling sorry for yourself. (Still not a good day to actually paint)

Day Four – That’s it! You’ve done the time. Now you can go re-work that painting.

Image above (ironically titled Three Days) is a classic example of why I should have followed the hangover rule. I won’t be looking at this sorry specimen for a while now…it’s all too ‘footsteps on the dancefloor’…who wants to be reminded of the shimmering ‘before’ when you’re staring at the morning after…?

After sleeping on it….

There are two things you can do really…wake up …realise the full horror of what was the previous day’s (painting) activity, then wilfully go back to sleep and hope it doesn’t really exist. (otherwise known as denial/avoidance!)

Or, wake up….realise the full horror is really as bad as you thought, go on to realise it belonged to yesterday, and vow to work a new days promise to reclaim the horror and create something new. (I don’t know what this is called it’s not a process I’m too familiar with!)

Finally – (there is a third option called – ‘wake up and realise it was just a nightmare after all’….but that only usually happens in fairy tales….Real Life tends to have it’s fair share of Real Horror.)

Yesterday I was all into thinking about knowing when to stop is a pretty good idea.

Today, I over-painted three paintings. Yes. Three. Three. T H R E E . Goodness Sake. Talk about inability to learn.

here’s the sad little results of one (Crossing the Great Divide) :

BEFORE / AFTER / detail v2

I don’t mind the sea urchin image, it’s all pretty etc, but that’s the problem ; the whole thing just went over the line into decorative, rather than just idealogical…as in , it’s too pretty pretty now for me to consider it serious.

Is pretty still valid? Can beauty be heavyweight? Does it have to be pig-dog ugly to be a contender for the art title? Is it just too late at night to ponder this? Will it all seem far less tragic in the morning?

Ruination #2 : (Was – ‘Three Days’, now to be retitled – ‘What went wrong in Three Minutes’, (or Similar) :

        

It’s too darn happy now. the colours have overtaken the message. the colourless arc has disappeared into the background. and, it’s gone all pretty. happy. optimistic etc. What was I thinking – listening to Gospel music is far too uplifting!

The Third Abomination is too dreadful to post. I’m gonna sleep on it.

Coming Home.

October 2011, Townhill, Fife.

Crossing the Great Divide

Crossing the Great Divide, 2012. Oil on board 60cm sq.

I am not convinced this is totally finished. But I’m reluctant to go too far. Knowing when to stop is THE thing.
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